I had a tough week, there will not be any pictures of the hard parts

The fall rains have come
All grey awashed, storm ridden
The road has gone under

Lotus flower
Your boat is launched
I set you free

It has been a really hard week for me professionally and personally. That is all I can say, really. As many of my generation do, allow me this quote from the Princess Bride: "life IS pain, Highness."

I found myself silent the last week. I have not written for my blog or created anything. I had to stop and evaluate. Something had to change. It was time.

Several people have told me recently that I was a catalyst for change in their lives. One lady, a kind and thoughtful member of the cat rescue community, told me "you know you sent me on this path? You know that, don't you?" I did not realize, but do acknowledge that I indeed did guide her in that direction. I was profoundly touched. This was the day before I left my office one last time.

My thoughts ran "If I can be a catalyst for positive change in others, why can I not change my own life?" And so I did.

I decided to quit working as an office manager this week. I left the office behind. It was tough, really, so hard that I do not even yet have words to describe it. I had worked there about 18 years. I am aware that my years with the doctors were the longest relationship of my life, other than my biological family and my reenactment family. I guess the doctors and long-term staff were my "third" family. But it was time to say good bye.

There are few things I have ever done that were harder. It had to be.

I left the office for the last time as an employee on Thursday. Today is Sunday. I am still finding I have a tendency to think of the middle of next week as taken up by "work." My life will need a need pattern, a frame work, structure.

I guess this is where the second half begins. A play of two acts, the curtain fell on Act I, now the curtain rises on Act II. I wonder what will happen? And I hope the set designer and play wright are both good.

I leave my reader with some photos of the truest companions I could know in this life time:

Yes, cats, my cats

And my dogs. I am coming to believe that we incarnate, some of us, on purpose to experience love, pure love. And sometimes loyal truest love can only be given by a dog.

Indy, Professor Jones, my sweetheart

Torvald a' Bigbootee, my husband's heart dog

And Kona, the Queen Bee, our "Nugget of Evil"